They say that children are cruel. I know this is true because I was one of the cruel ones. At least a little bit. I was picked on more than I ever picked on anyone, I’m assuming because I was 5’3″ and 130 lbs by the time I was 10, but I did have my moments of wretchedness. You would think since I am now grown, and haven’t children of my own, I would be insusceptible to the bullying that I was subject to. Not so. I have vowed to tell mostly the truth in this blog. So here goes…
My Rockstar has a 9 yr old daughter. That in itself is not the issue, though I believe a 9 yr old son would have been easier to deal with. When we began dating, my Rockstar was a bit dubious when I declared my position as a potentially awesome step-mother-like figure. Perhaps it was because I have next to no experience with children, or perhaps he was aware of the Daughter’s and my dispositions and need for attention. Who knows. Let’s just say he may have been right.
While the Daughter is quite affectionate, (which I love) at times she can resemble Regan from The Excorcist. (during the really scary part.) Mainly these incidents originate when she is told to do something she doesn’t want to do; I understand for the first 7 years she was babied and not really disciplined, but COME ON. I am going to use a phrase I never thought I would- when I was a kid. When I was a kid, if I acted that way I woulda gotten my ass beat. I do not in any way condone corporal punishment, but I DO believe the FEAR of an ass-beating should be instilled into cerebrum.
The episode that prompted me to compose this post has happened more than once. Last night, everything was misleadingly copascetic. We ate dinner, they played tennis (I detest running) and I read a “bednight” story to the Daughter. Then it was actually time for sleep. I have largely given up trying to actually get that kid to stay in bed after I’ve tucked her in. I just go to bed, since she doesn’t feel compelled to listen to me. I was engrossed in reading my bio of Dolly Parton (Yay Dolly!) when the Daughter comes into our bedroom
The Daughter: “I’m sleeping in here.”
My response is to remind her that she doesn’t listen very well.
Me: “You better get in bed, since daddy has already told you 3 times.”
The Daughter: “You know, I am the Queen and I live here. You are just staying here for a little while. Maybe YOU should go to bed.”
I admit. If it was a kid I didn’t know, I would probably be laughing too. However. Having a 9 yr old tell me my living situation( and my relationship) is on probation irked the hell outta me. (It also made it impossible to sleep.)
My question is, I realize this is something that my Rockstar needs to address with his Daughter. Or with me. If I am to be a built-in part of their lives, she needs to get it through her head. If I AM on probation, then I would much rather just be told to get the fuck out now. How am I supposed to instill respect into a 9 yr old who doesn’t even understand the concept? And yes, I am 29, but it still hurts my feelings to be bullied. I don’t like it when events in my life make me want to say, “Fuck this shit.”