Why must it be so hard to write fiction? I don’t exactly relish sitting here figuring out how to write a sentence perfectly for an hour straight, when I just want to get on with the story; but it would be a suck-ass book if I left out all the details….
Daily Archives: October 21, 2011
A month or so ago, I was checking out my Facebook when I came upon a friend request from a Mnde Mdba. Now this was not exactly her name, ( it was something very similiar) but she was from Turkey or some other country I have never visited, which confused me a bit as to why she would have requested my very important Facebook friendship. I do not have any privacy settings on my life (obviously), so I am assuming she was just cruising around looking for fabulous glittery friends and decided to pick me, so I thought “What the hell?” and approved her friend request.
A few days after that, I was on Facebook again, (promoting my blog shamelessly) when a chat box popped up from my new friend Mnde. Now I must tell you, chat boxes are a source of irritation for me, because I am usually the one causing them to pop up on OTHER people’s Facebooks, which in turn causes said people to quickly log off and pretend they didn’t see that I was trying to talk to them. If they didn’t want to talk to me, WHY the hell would they add me as a friend?! As I have said, I have no privacy settings, so any photo stalking or general cyber creeping is possible WITHOUT adding me as a friend. Anyhoo, that is for another post.
So the fact that anyone desired to actually chat to me was a thrill I rarely experience. This is how our little chat went:
Me: Hi, not that I mind, but why did you add me to your friends? (I can be very blunt sometimes)
Mnde: Because you sexy.
Me: (oh geez) Well, yes I know. So where are you from?
Mnde: Italy. I love sex.
Me: I HAVE heard that italians do. I do too. How very fun.
Mnde: You have webcam?
Me: No, why would I need a webcam?
Mnde: I want to do you. On webcam. You have pictures for me?
I must break here to tell you a bit about Mnde. It was quite obvious that her English was not highly fluent. Yes, I said HER, because when I checked out her profile during this little convo, I found out that according to Facebook she is a 15 year old cute girl from Italy who is a widow. Now, I am not so simple-minded to think all of this may be true, but I wasn’t feeling like flirting with a 15 year old anything.
Me: Aren’t you a little young? (testing)
Mnde: Yes, I am young. I LOVE sex, Sexy.
This reminded me of this little game a local radio station used to play, called Scared Straight. They would go into a chatroom and pose as a young girl and try to bait pedophiles into calling them, which they would then ream out on the air. I will state that I am NOT a pedophile, but how would this Mnde know this? I felt baited and deceived.
Me: That’s very nice that you love sex so much, but you should really wait until you hit puberty before you start having it all the time. I am going to delete you now, because I don’t need a horny little girl chatting at me all the time asking for pictures. Goodbye.
Mnde: You have pictures for me?
Obviously, Mnde doesn’t get it.
P.S. A few days later, I had another friend request from a person with a foreign name. I think they are out to get me.