It has come to my attention that a certain reader believes me to be a man. (Despite the fact that I posted a picture of myself) Because the male species is considerably inferior to the female (Sorry, boys. It’s not your fault. We don’t have penises to distract us) this information is quite disturbing to me. I realize the content of my blog is NOT what you would find daily on another woman’s blog, however, that is the thrill, is it not?
In all honesty, I believe there are many women out there who think the same way I do, they are just afraid to say whatever is on their mind, for various reasons. I consider myself to be the one to speak for odd and fucked up women everywhere. “Well-behaved women rarely make history”, or so I’ve heard, so if indeed I am to be mentioned in the textbooks of the future, it seems I must continue to misbehave and speak my mind.
It was brought to my attention the fool-hardiness of posting a picture of myself and mentioning where I work. These days, there are many creepies and stalker-type people about. Having already encountered said creepies BEFORE ever having a blog, I must state that no creepies can disturb me as much as those I’ve already met. And so, if posting a picture of myself causes the Brotherhood of Creepies to stir, I say, “Come and get me, Creepies! But beware. My 5″ heels are deadly when worn on my powerfully-muscled legs!” At least I will have something to write about in my blog if they come.
I have been told that the woman who would write the shit I write is seriously fucked up; and that the person who writes this blog is not that woman. It seems you each will have to get out your Fucked Up Meter and measure the extent of my fucked-up-edness, or, if you wish me to save you a few minutes, you can just believe me when I say, “I am abso-fucking-lutely without a doubt completely and utterly fucked up.” There’s not a damn thing I can do about it, so I guess I’ll just go with the flow…
Sparklebumpsthebookwhore 
Crocofly isn’t so bad tho…
Applaud a woman who comes out and says she likes sex.
The relationship described above seems mixed up to me. Woman have a straightforward relationship with a man’s penis – any man. “Do I want it, yes/no?” And if she does, she gets it most of the time.
The confused relationship is the man’s with a vagina. The man is distracted by the vagina. In fact, some men have been known to write entire blogs based on this distraction, going into great detail about their pursuit of the vagina.
Amen, Brother. Preach it!
Ya.. I’ve seen those blogs all over the internet. I think my brain would turn to mush if I let my blog become a 1 trick pony.
For the record though, I’m willing to bet in about 5 minutes I could come up with a GIANT list of women’s blogs that were ALL about dating. But God Bless em..
I think they dynamic between women and men is a Truely Interesting Dance.
more like watching a butterfly try to mate with a crocodile. Awkward and potentially dangerous!
Yes there is a reason I talk about sex and shoes and work and sex. Because it would just get boring if I talked about one thing all the time.
Well ya… And the word Butterdile just sounds kinda weird..
HHAHAHA. You have something worse to distract you. You vagina. The difference between men and women is men and their penises have pretty much a straight forward relationship.
Women and their Vaginas have sort of a confusing relationship where she trys to embrace sex, deny that she likes it, but at the same time want to admit she is embracing her vagina (sexuality), while trying to not seem to slutty and not be taken advantage of just for her vagina, but not wanting to be a prude, but not wanting to be a slut, wanting to be a slut at times but only if it’s the right person, but then “what happens now that we’re sleeping together? Where is this going?”
( I think I could do that forever by the way but I would have to create a whole blog devoted to the topic of a woman’s relationship with her vagina.)
Hey but if that’s what you consider Superior… 😉
I LOVE the sex, and I embrace it fully. I admit that some people would consider me slutty, and I have taken advantage of men because of their boners. Now that we have slept together, if it was good, I wish to do it some more. If it wasn’t, I do not wish to continue what we started.
So there.
Shit.. Maybe I was drunk.. I don’t remember. Don’t hate me. 😉
I don’t hate you. You were just having a dumbass moment because you were distracted by your penis. 😉
Happy Christmas you very female Sparkle. Why o why can people never shut up when they should? Isn’t it really clear that you are a woman? Or that you pretend to be one very well 😉 ? Nah, people. So tiring.
I think that I could be a man very well too… I should start an alter-ego man blog.
Okay, I’m feeling something that… it’s all tingly…. wow…. the visions in my head.
Perv! Perv! Get off my blog!
🙂 Just kidding. Welcome, Horny Person. We are all friends here.
H.E. and Sparkle each 5″ heels. I know what I want for Christmas.
Greedy little fucker, aren’t ya? 😉 I’m not about to share H.E. with you. Even though you have better access….
I bet you do. And I bet you know you can get even taller heels, and hose to match. You’ll feel so pretty.
You should HR! You are awfully pretty.
Like a girl. hehehehe……
6″ with fishnets, I’ve got the legs to pull it off. 😉
Are you trying to tease me? Because it’s working. I have a things for men in tights….
You couldn’t be a man. But even if you are, Merry Christmas.
Hey! I could be a man if I tried! Watch!
“Da-aaamn, that bitch has got a fine ass and her tits are great!” *Adjusting junk* 😀
Everyone is fucked up.
So….Merry Christmas!
Happy Hanukkah. 🙂
YOU’RE A MAN?!?!
Well what are you waiting for? Get that big dick (‘cuz I know it is) of yours over to NH and do me already!
I’m on my way, Baby. Gettin’ hard just thinkin’ bout it. 😉
You’re HE Ellis’s twin brother?
Yes, but he is much hotter than I.
There’s a picture of you in the corner and your “gravatar” is a pair of juicy lips. Not a thing a guy should be doing.
Oh, I am sure I do many things as a woman that I should not be doing too…
You’re not fucked up, you’re sparkly – it is sooooo much better!
I agree. Everyone should be as “sparkley” as me. 🙂
Just one comment to the creepies of the world…
“Shut up. I wear heels bigger than your dick.”
😉
That’s what I was thinking, but I figured if I said it they would want to kill me, and not just rape me….