Daily Archives: December 25, 2011

Dumbass


After opening my bass amp from my Rockstar a day early, I was distraught to find that despite the fact that he left a chord out for me, there was no sound coming from it. After plugging in various cords and whatnot; watching numerous videos on youtube on how to set up your amp, and flipping the on/off switch repeatedly, I found this little thing called a Volume Knob on my bass.

It helps if you turn it up.

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Filed under Christmas, Humor, Life, music, Uncategorized

What Thou Hath Received


Here are just a few things I got for Christmas:

A gift of money from a member of the congregation at the church where I play piano, accompanied with a note that said, “Merry Christmas, Sparkle. Please do not spend this on shoes.”

An ornament from a member of the congregation where I play piano. The ornament was a tiny replica of the shoes I wore today to church. (I sense a theme here)

Another gift of money from an anonymous member of the church where I play piano, NOT accompanied by a note with restrictions.

A shocked and disturbed look from my Auntie when I plowed into the Christmas cookie plate.

An offer from my shocked Auntie, “You can take a doggy bag home with you”, when I attacked said cookie plate.

Hugs. Lots of hugs.

The satifaction of finding that I lost 3 pounds today, despite having eaten 500 cookies.

An admonition from Gramma telling me not to post rantisms about my father on Facebook. (I have no idea what she’s talking about.)

A shake of my mother’s head when Gramma admonished me, and a reassurance that Gramma doesn’t know what she’s talking about.

An almost-dance with Grampa when he stood up to hug me and we both tripped.

Scratches on the back of my thighs from the tulle on my Christmas skirt.

Approval from the two beagles at my Auntie’s house when I sprayed my new banana-coconut body spray from Gramma.

Sparkly (picked out just for me) picture ornaments in which I may place pictures of my beloveds.

A bass amp that I still haven’t figured out how to plug in properly. (Some rockstar I will make.)

The reassurance that I “have flair”, given because of my lovely outfit.

Heartburn from the plethora of cookies I partook of.

Goodnight and Merry Christmas. XOXO

 

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Filed under Christmas, Humor, Life, Love, Uncategorized