13 Questions


When I meet new people, I like to ask them13 questions to get to know them better. This also allows them to get to know ME better because of the odd and fascinating questions I ask. 13, you ask? I’ve told you before about the my detestation for even numbers. That’s the only reason. Toady, I have decided to ask myself 13 questions, since obviously you people are never going to ask me. Most of these are the questions I ask other people, but there are just one or two I am unable to answer because then I’d have to kill you, so I’ve replaced those ones with equally entertaining questions. Here we go:

1. What was your first car?

My first car was a retired police-issued Chevy Caprice. I purchased it at a silent auction that I had to send my parents to enter my bid on because I was not yet 18. I got pulled over in that car not less than 18 times for speeding, but only received one ticket. (I guess I was even kinda cute back then.

2. What kind of underwear do you wear?

This is a complicated question to answer. I prefer going commando, but when absolutely necessary, I wear thongs simply because I hate panty lines. My ass looks best in boyshorts though.

3. What’s your favorite country?

This is highly unpatriotic of me, but I think Ireland is amazing. Mostly because they have leprachauns and castles and shit.

4. Do you believe in love at first sight?

I do, because it happened to me in 4th grade and remained all through high school. As far as I know, it was one-sided on my part, but never mind about that.

5. What’s your favorite animal?

Unicorns are my favorite animal. And I don’t want to here that they don’t exist, because the Bible mentions them, so they must. And YOU just never saw one because you aren’t a virgin. I hear virgins are the only ones who can catch them, so I guess I won’t be getting one as a pet anytime soon either. Dammit.

6. Do you snore?

Not that I’ve heard. I do, however, make noises and twitch which probably irritates my Rockstar since I cling to him every night. I think I make it up to him when I have conversations about tweety bird and other random subjects while I’m asleep though.

7. When you were young, what did you want to be when you grew up?

Another toughy. I first remember wanting to be an artist. When I realized I couldn’t really draw, I wanted to live on a horse ranch, and I wanted to be a writer. I also wanted to be a fireman, a soldier, an actress, a singer, and just a few million other things.

8. What was the craziest place you’ve ever had sex?

In a parking ramp before a concert in my yellow short-box step-side stick-shift Ranger Splash. Yes, it was quite squishy.

9. What’s your favorite  alcoholic drink?

I get odd looks from bartenders when I order my Peach Schnapps and water. I don’t drink it much anymore because when I pick up booze, I buy stuff both my Rockstar and I will drink. I DO like Southern Comfort alot too.

10. What is your favorite curse word?

I really like the word “fuck”, because it’s just so versatile, but everyone says that, and I must maintain my individuality, so I must say “cocksucker” is my favorite curse word, though I’m  not certain if it actually IS a curse word. It makes me giggle when I say  (or scream) it though.

11. Can you get off on oral sex?

I would like to state that oral sex is lovely. However, if I have a choice between having someone’s head buried in my crotch or having a boner stuck in my cooch, I will always opt for the latter. I actually get hotter GIVING oral sex than receiving that. No, that wasn’t an offer…

12. Have you ever taken or tried any drugs?

I used to eat whole bottles of children’s Tylenol when I was young when my parents weren’t looking. (Have you ever tried that shit? It tastes exactly like Sweettarts!) Other than that, I have refrained from trying any recreational substances for the sole reason that I have no doubt I would like anything I tried way too much. As far as pot goes- I won’t try it because I don’t really need something to give me the munchies when my gut is a bottomless pit anyway.

13. Have you ever been arrested?

It wasn’t my fault. And yes, I asked the arresting offecer why cops are such assholes.

Well, that’s all I can think of right now. Feel free to ask a couple of your own questions if you wish! XOXO

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20 Comments

Filed under Humor, Life, Love, Sex, Uncategorized

20 responses to “13 Questions

  1. Ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh these are awesome!!! I shall have to sit down and think about my answers teehee.

  2. I can link 5 of these to one event in my life (the snoring came later) – I feel I have got to know you very well these past 5 minutes. Brilliant stuff!

  3. If I answered those questions, even I wouldn’t want to read the results.

  4. 1. A Dodge something or other. It was a converted taxi.
    2. B/B’s
    3. USA, although there’s many aspects I would change if I could.
    4. Lust at first sight, yes. Love, no.
    5. Dogs!
    6. So I’m told.
    7. I’ve never really thought about the future. I could say it’s because I’m too busy living in the moment, but that’s cliched and lame.
    8. Outdoor running track, I guess.
    9. Vodka, though I don’t really drink much.
    10. Jackass. Not sure if that counts.
    11. Giving or getting? Yes and no. Or is it no and yes?
    12. Yes, ma’am.
    13. No, ma’am.

    • First of all, you are not cliche or lame one bit.
      Secondly, I must say I think that’s the first time ever you’ve ever commented almost sexually explicitly on my blog… I have two questions: #8- were you running WHILE doing it? because I just don’t know how that would work. And #11- is it yes or no?
      P.S. You calling me ma’am makes me feel old. Thanks.

  5. I love your favorite animal! OF course they’re real, otherwise where did all those posters come from in 1984? My Blondie believe that mermaids are real but that the duck-billed platypus is definitely a hoax!!

  6. 1. 1972 MGB Convertible
    2. Little boys superhero boxer shorts
    3. America (lame, I know)
    4. Absolutely!
    5. A dead one. So not an animal lover
    6. Yup
    7. Ballerina, Astronaut, Race car driver
    8. Carnival haunted house
    9. This concoction HR makes that’s lime juice, coconut milk and Malibu.
    He calls it “trailer trash cocktail” and serves it in a mason jar
    10. MOTHERFUCKER!!!! Shouted at the top of my lungs
    11. Uh…
    12. Nope. It’s why I don’t look forty. Drugs age you. Coke is the WORST
    13. Never. I’m a good girl 😉

    BTW, love your number 8.

    • I’m sorry, we cannot be married. You don’t like animals.
      Yay for you on the carnival haunted house! Was it a… frightening experience? 🙂
      And let me just answer your number #11 for you- if Sparklebumps were administering said oral, you’d get off. 😉 I said we couldn’t marry. I didn’t say anything about tussling..

  7. Awesome- “because they have leprechauns, castles, and shit.” I would immediately love a person who asked me this crazy sh*t on a first meeting- negating your # 4. I’ve got a squishier #6 than you- high school pool after gym class swimming. Bung!

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