Letters of Desire- The First

I found a key while I was digging through the recesses of my mind. I looked around wondering what it unlocked when I saw a wooden trunk with ornate carvings appear before me. I tried the key in the lock, and it slid perfectly in as though it were Cinderella’s foot in the Glass Slipper. With a click, the trunk popped open and I discovered an entire world  of memories hidden inside. Atop the pile of collected life, I found a stack of letters that was enwrapped in a satin ribbon. I looked through them and saw that they seem to have been written from a lover to a lover. This is the first…

To the One I cannot live without,

I’ve just returned from a tryst with you. In all honesty, I should be terrified that we will be found out, but when I recall the desire in your eyes as our bodies carressed, I can think of nothing else. Ay, me! Even now, just the thought of your skin against mine heats my blood so that I tremble uncontrollably! I thrill at the way your delicate hand touched my face and slid down my throat . Such an innocent gesture, and yet the way it raised gooseflesh on my body is a wonder indeed! The softness of your skin is unlike anything I’ve ever felt.

When you removed your gown and your shift- what a glorious sight I beheld! It is no wonder King Solomon wrote about the beauty of his lover, though I cannot imagine she was as lovely as you. My heart races at the thought; if I were overcome with blindness at this very moment, I would live content, knowing that I have seen God’s finest creation in all it’s splendor.

Do not mistake my words for vain lust, Love. Aye, ’tis true Lust’s presence follows you wherever you go, but it is your soul that makes you truly beauteous. Not a touch from your fingers would I need if only I could  bask in the aura of your amazing presence for all of eternity. A million reasons I could give for my unending adoration, but suffice to say that it is the whole of you that has me in shackles at your feet.

I dare now to request another meeting, my Fair One, because I cannot breath without you, and every moment we are apart brings me one step closer to death.

Your Servant Forever

Down to Earth

So it seems that I am growing increasingly popular in my circle as of late. I suppose this makes sense since it is MY circle, and I am at the center of it. However, because I consider myself a bitch, it is surprising to myself how many people actually seem to genuinely LIKE me. There are even a few crushes in there, but since those individuals are in other ways attached, I digress.

One of the recurring themes that seems to be quite evident when people are speaking of my general awesomeness is the fact that I am “down to earth”. Since the only definition of this phrase I actually comprehended was the literal one- as in, gravity it keeping me down to earth- I decided to look it up and further feed the Knowledge Monster in my head.

The first place I looked was Dictionary.com, only to find that their definition of “down to earth” was : practical and realistic.

At first I was confused. These two words are almost completely foreign to me, and are certainly not two words that anyone in my entire life has EVER used to describe me. (Is it strange that I feel relief at that?) I decided to search further.

Where to go to find the answers I seek? How about Answers.com. There I found the following:

Down to earth:

1. 1. Not pretentious or affected; straightforward.
   2. Not overly ornate; simple in style.

Now I was getting somewhere. While I would not necessarily call myself non-pretentious, I would most certainly agree that I am straightforward, and evidenced HERE with the Butterface incident. However, the second definition had my head spinning. While I believe simplicity is beautiful in it’s own way, (just as a Butterface is to her boyfriend) I simply have never understood it. My style has been described as flamboyant, crazy, and Halloween-ish, but never simple. To prove my point, I shall redirect you HERE.

My next stop on the quest to define my Self was Urbandictionary.com. (My go-to place for pop knowledge)

Definition #4 caught my eye:

a vague, meaningless expression that a wide variety of people use to express an undefinable positive quality in an other

Well, They don’t seem to know what It is, but it seems some people think I have It. I guess that answers the question I asked HERE. At least It’s a positive thing.

Here’s their #5 definition:

Someone basic, attached to day by day issues, ruled by the common sense. Not a dreamer or idealistic, not into the creative field or the Arts. Usually connoted with one either without studies or a especial knowledge or intellectual skill.

Considering that I am into writing and ooze intellectual skill and especial (is that a word?) knowledge while dreaming of living in a castle and believing in love at first sight while my Rockstar is yelling at me about not having common sense, I think that this definition does not suit me well.

More perplexed than ever, I sought out other people who were just as baffled as I. Here are some answers they recieved when they asked the mind-boggling question- What does “down to earth ” mean? :

when a person is “down to earth” they are humble and do not put on any airs or flaunt their fame or fortune.  They would be someone you feel you could talk to, open up with, ask advice from and you could trust what they say and their opinion

Everyone talks to me. However, someday, when I’m famous and fortune-ate, I may have to interrupt them to squeal, “Look at me, bitches! I gots my Mustang and by the way, that was my dead body on Law and Order SVU.”

Non-metaphorically, the “Down-to-earth” person is easier to understand and concerned with things more likely to be what others are concerned with (not, for example, the importance of the Urantia book to religion or the validity of Ubuntu operating system.) This person is also, therefore, more likely to be sympathetic to another human being. Over-educated folks tend to be sympathetic to other educated people. And standard human sin and pride being always present, over-educated folk become egotistical towards less educated folk, making them all but useless and very unsympathetic.

A “down to earth” person is concerned with things more likely to be what others are concerned with- Um, sorry, when I was concerned with the outcome of Wrestlemania, no one else quite seemed to be. As far as books go, I get “There you go, blabbing about silly books again,” quite frequently.

over-educated folk become egotistical towards less educated folk- I would never look down upon less educated folk. It’s not their fault they aren’t as smart as me.

Usually such people seem to be high quality, intelligent, classy, or in some way gifted or privileged, yet seem to relate well to ordinary folks and the less than fortunate in a very amicable manner – and are not pretentious or haughty.

Thank you, I strive to be a high quality product. Being in some way gifted with excess boobage helps a bit. But I try to expose only a small amount of cleavage, therefore remaining classy.

It means your grounded. Your head is not floating up in the clouds so people can actually relate to you because you are on the same level.

My head is firmly attached to the rest of me, but I cannot say for sure that the rest of me stays on the ground. After all, I AM a superhero.