Tired


I’m too tired to sleep. So while I’m lying in bed trying to makeout with the Sandman, I think to myself, “I should get up.” But I’m too tired to. So I lie in bed until exhaustion overcomes me. In the morning, my damn alarm goes off and I think to myself, “I should get up and eat breakfast before work.” But I’m too tired to. So I doze off and on until the last possible second and then I rush to make myself semi-presentable. While washing my face, I think to myself, “I should do a super fun makeup effect with my newly purchased 100 shades of eyeshadow.” But I’m too tired. So I slap on an uninteresting shade of beige and off to work I go.

When I get to work, I think to myself, “I should call all the applicants and set up interviews.” But I’m too tired. So I struggle through yet another day at work with fewer people than I need because there is no one else to call. When I’m closing up the store, I think to myself, “i should really do as good of a job as I would like to.” But I’m too tired. So instead I do a job that is not up to my standards.

My skin is too tired to make the effort; my feet are too tired to wear heels; and my boobs are too tired to stay perky.

When my friends call me, I don’t answer, because I’m too tired to sit on the phone for extended periods of time, and I have nothing to talk about except work. When an intersting song pops into my head that I think I should write down, I don’t, because I’m too tired to think of a word that rhymes with “winter”. When I get home from work, I think to myself that I should make a beautiful lunch for my Rockstar to take in his ugly lunchbox, but I’m too tired. There was also a point last week when I almost turned down a little Naked Fun Time with my Rockstar because I was too tired. Almost.

Basically, in the end, I will have no friends because I’m too tired to hang with them, no Rockstar because I’m too tired to take care of him, and no job because I’m too tired to do what I’m getting paid to do. Then I will have all the time in the world to sleep…

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2 Comments

Filed under Beauty, Humor, Life, Uncategorized, Work

2 responses to “Tired

  1. This is profound in its simple truth.

  2. Rich Crete

    Ah yes. The restaurant business strikes again.

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